Relationships

My girlfriend once told me that I'm not romantic enough, and that I didn't even know what foreplay was. The next evening I brought home a set of red and blue ball-gags and a harness like you see on a goat. She postponed the wedding indefinitely, so the next week, I brought home a set of masks, one of a pig, the other of an armadillo. She broke off our relationship that day.

It was almost like she had no appreciation for all the effort I was putting into the relationship. Good riddance.